Zach Wilson, NY Jets, UK, London
Zach Wilson, New York Jets, Getty Images

The UK edition of the New York Jets’ Twitter presence took a flavorful approach to the NFL schedule release

Bangers, beans, and…Braxton Berrios?

The New York Jets’ United Kingdom-catered Twitter account added an international taste to the release of the NFL’s schedule, turning to British food and beverages for a tongue-in-cheek education of Gang Green’s opponents. Times and dates were attached to the matchups on Thursday, with the Jets drawing the Baltimore Ravens in their Week 1 opener on Sept. 11.

Those Ravens were compared to Ribena, a blackcurrant-based soft drink originally introduced in Bristol in 1933. The accompanying caption and explanation – describing the Ravens and Ribena as “Solid. Reliable. Purple.” – is one of the nicer descriptions alongside that of the Buffalo Bills, the Jets’ divisional rivals who get compared to doner kebab (the vertically prepared meat described as “Actually pretty good but you feel dirty admitting it”).

Baltimore’s AFC North brethren, the Pittsburgh Steelers (who face the Jets on Oct. 2), get the steak and kidney pie treatment (“Historic and generally popular, part of the culture whether you like it or not”).

Others, however, are forced to deal with the cliches and connotations often associated with British cuisine.

The Jacksonville Jaguars (who will face the Jets in their lone nationally televised appearance on Dec. 22) and corned beef are among those victimized (“It is unclear why you would choose to eat this.”), as were their fellow Floridians the Miami Dolphins, whose sweet comparison to Pink Wafer Biscuits was immediately torn down with a not-so-subtle jab at their late-season collapses (“Brightly coloured but can be a bit crumbly.”).

Other teams were torn apart for their on-field exploits while the food got off unscathed. The Chicago Bears were compared to the Wagon Wheel marshmallow cookies (Tasty but some claim they were bigger in the 80s.”) and the long-suffering Detroit Lions received another cookie-based barb via Rich Tea Biscuits (“Traditional and, erm, consistent.”)

View the full thread here.

See the Jets’ full 2022 schedule here.

Geoff Magliocchetti is on Twitter @GeoffJMags

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Geoff Magliocchetti is a veteran football writer with years of credentialed experience with the Jets and Giants. Email: geoffmags90@gmail.com
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